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Mele Kyari has levelled up! We’re sure the man was very happy to be appointed as the new Group Managing Director of NNPC by our favourite president, Buhari.

Now, there has been a lot of commotion concerning Kyari, but you can always count on us to bring you the real tea. Starting with the fact that

1. Mele Kyari is NOT, Buhari’s chief of staff Abba Kyari’s brother.

People, let us understand this simple fact: he is, not, not Abba’s brother. We know they have the same name, and we know they both have that sus look about them, but we as a people have to be honest with ourselves; if they were really brother’s, we think this promotion would have happened sooner. Just saying.

2. Yes, Kyari has worked in the NNPC before.

As the Group General Manager, Crude Oil Marketing Division; that is one of the divisions of the NNPC. And we didn’t expect anything less from our sugar daddy! But rumour has it that, brand new NNPC sugar daddy Kyari has been rapidly promoted throughout his time at NNPC with less than ideal cross-divisional experience required to manage the monster that is NNPC.

He is definitely one to watch, as the profit or loss accruing future of NNPC is in his hands.

3. You never know what he’s thinking

Just like Arya Stark, no one knows what his next move will be. Now we’re not saying Kyari is going to go around killing people, but the question is how is he going to tackle this job.

Here we have a man whose next move is unpredictable; is he going to improve things or is he going to make everything worse. Will this quality make for good negotiating with his killer poker face, or does he lack the intuition needed to be successful. Does he like you or does he want you fired? Does he like his plantain soft or hard? All very important questions people!

NNPC Tower

Read more about these Buhari times here.

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